| (An excited maiden lady writes to her old school |
| friend, mostly in capitals and italics. |
| Dear Lucy, you will never guess! |
| My luck has changed -- well, more or less. |
| An incident occurred today |
| Which banished all my blues away. |
| I found this very afternoon |
| I'm rich! I'm rich! Or will be soon. |
| For as I sat for tea and toast |
| There came a letter in the post. |
| I stared at it, my feelings mixed. |
| A foreign stamp had been affixed. |
| Nigerian, to be precise. |
| I tore it open, read it twice. |
| A tragic tale was told therein, |
| (I read it as I sipped my gin.) |
| Of double-dealing from a brother -- |
| (I gulped it down and poured another!) |
| The writer told me that I came |
| Well recommended, for my name |
| Was known to be of good repute |
| Within the Women's Institute. |
| And thus had widely been discussed |
| As being someone they could trust! |
| He then commenced to tell his tale. |
| My dear, I went completely pale. |
| A certain Prince, of Royal Birth, |
| Has several million dollars worth |
| Of stocks and shares and gold as well, |
| But languishes within a cell. |
| His brother has usurped the throne |
| And cast him into gaol alone. |
| I've never read of such betrayal -- |
| Not even in the Daily Mail. |
| To free the Prince, his Royal hoard |
| Must urgently be sent abroad. |
| But who to trust? Apparently |
| I have a name for honesty! |
| And so he's written with a plea -- |
| They need a person such as me |
| To take a Very Large Amount |
| Into my Barclay's bank account. |
| And all I really have to do |
| Is send my banking details through. |
| (And a thousand, that's because it |
| 's needed as a small deposit. |
| Once I've given my permission, |
| They will pay me a commission. |
| That will be At Least a Third. |
| But Lucy -- please -- don't breath a word! |
| For at the slightest hint of this |
| The enterprise will go amiss. |
| Not a word must be revealed -- |
| And so, like me, your lips are sealed. |
| Now Lucy dear, don't have hysteria, |
| I'll be off soon, to see Nigeria. |
| Because, of course, I have to sign |
| Upon some sort of dotted line. |
| That such good fortune should accrue -- |
| I can't believe it -- but it's true! |
| For very soon, I'll have a million. |
| With Love... Your best-est school-chum... Gillian. |
| P.S. |
| They say that soon I'll be invited. |
| Lucy, I am so excited! |
| It's good to know, when I set sail, |
| This is a plan that Cannot Fail. |
| © Leonard Morley 2009 |